here is the first image of me as a 21 year old.

i will now be going out and filling my belly with liquor to celebrate.

“My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I’m happy. I can’t figure it out. What am I doing right?”

- Charles Schulz

this is the last photo taken of as a 20 year old. i am officially 21 and i honestly don’t know how to feel about it, i can tell you i am happy.

my life has finally fallen into place.

my cousin was right when she said,

“you don’t really find yourself until you’re in college.”

she told me this when i was young, but i finally understand what she meant.

i have found a boy who treats me so well and loves me for who i am, and accepts me, i have friends that i can communicate with and know they will be around for a long time.

i finally have found that connection i’ve been missing with my photography. i am finally able to to look at an image and fall deeply in love with it and be proud that i took that picture. my passion for photography is growing everyday and ideas keep coming to me.

this year will be a good one. i will have no expectations, but i will take as many risk as possible, travel as much as possible, love as much as possible.

i am living the seaweed life.

The Lovely Sparrows - Year of the Dog(click me)

(via Seaweed Life.)

Nothing Gets Crossed Out 

Recently I have been feeling a little off.
I hate not doing anything… 
I feel like a part of me is missing.
I want to go on a adventure.

I had a dream I was all alone, that no one wanted me,
but I woke up to a face I don’t think I could get tired of,
and he kissed me gently on the lips, 
as if he was reassuring me everything was okay.
he was the only thing that made me happy today.
he gave me a dandelion today when I walked out of class
and placed it in my hair.

I need to do something.
I don’t know what,
but I’ll figure it out.

This song has been stuck in my head all day:

Well, the future has got me worried, such awful thoughts. My head is a carousel of pictures. The spinning never stops. I just want someone to walk in front and I’ll follow the leader. 
Like when I fell under the weight of a schoolboy crush. I started carrying her books and doing lots of drugs. I almost forgot who I was, but came to my senses. 
Now I’m trying to be assertive. I’m making plans. I want to rise to the occasion, yeah, meet all of their demands. But all I do is just lay in bed and hide under the covers. 
Yeah, I know I should be brave but I’m just too afraid of all this change.
And it’s hard to focus through all this doubt. I keep making this “To Do” list but nothing gets crossed out. Working on the record seems pointless now. When the world ends, who’s gonna hear it? Well I’m trying to take some comfort in written words, yeah, Tim I heard your album and it’s better than good. When you get off tour I think we should hang and black out together. 
Because I’ve been feeling sentimental for days gone by… all those summers singing, drinking, laughing, wasting out time. Remember all those songs and the way we smiled in those basements made of music?
But now I’ve got to crawl to get anywhere at all. I’m not as strong as I thought. 
So when I’m lost in a crowd, I hope that you’ll pick me out. Oh, how I, I long to be found. The grass grew high. I laid down. Now, I wait for a hand to lift me up, help me stand. I’ve been laying so low don’t wanna lay here no more. 
Don’t wanna lay here no more.
Don’t wanna lay here no more.
Don’t wanna lay here no more.
No more… more…